Know Your Why (And make it a big one)!

I tried quitting sugar plenty of times before I managed to do it long term. I’d quit for a week, or two. Once I quit for a month, and once for six months, but I always went back to it.

When I look back now, I see one reason it didn’t stick was that my WHY wasn’t big enough.

Why I quit sugar (the first six times)

Here of some of my reasons WHY in my early attempts at quitting sugar:

• To lose weight
• To lose weight
• To lose weight
• To lose weight
• To be healthier (and lose weight)
• To have more energy (so I can exercise more so I can lose weight).

Notice a pattern here?

Losing weight and feeling healthy were not enough on their own to get me to quit sugar. When a craving struck, I could put those whys aside pretty easily. You know the drill:

• It’s just one piece of cake/ one cookie / a bit of icing.
• I’ll start again tomorrow.
• I’ll do an extra workout. Or… I’ll workout twice tomorrow.
• Aw, screw it.

I needed a bigger why.

Yes, I wanted to lose weight, but losing weight on its own, as a motivator, was not working for me. Partly because it’s a negative motivation. Law of attraction is like a toddler. It doesn’t hear the word “lose” in the lose weight scenario.

Ever notice that?
Tell a toddler not to kick your seat and what to they hear? “Kick my seat.”
Tell the Universe you want to lose weight and what does it hear?” “Weight.”

Tell yourself you are going to stop eating chocolate.
What do you do? Eat chocolate.

So, whether it’s your own inner toddler, or the Universe, basically, if you tell it you don’t want something, all it will give you is more of that thing.

Healing ancestral patterns: My big why

There is a generations-old pattern of alcoholism in my family. A real sadness in my life is that my dad died of cirrhosis, one month before his first grandchild was born. For a long time I was very angry at him. How could he not have stopped?

Since having kids, I’ve not been much of a drinker, but something I realized along my sugar journey was this:

Sugar is my alcohol.

All of the dysfunction that went into the generations-old pattern of alcoholism that lights up my family tree on both sides was present in my addiction to sugar. And I wanted to break that pattern — for my own kids. And for my grandkids, whom I really want to meet someday.

In my family, that pattern has to do with stifling creativity. Developing my own innate talents, expressing my creativity and modelling this to my children are all huge parts in changing this pattern. As is forgiving my ancestors for not knowing better. And making better choices around sugar (my alcohol) than those who came before me.

This is my WHY.

And here’s my WHY in action:

No cake for me. I’m trying to lose weight.
(Aw, screw it. I’ll work out twice tomorrow.)


No thank you. I can’t have a piece of birthday cake. I’m healing an ancestral pattern for the sake of my (not to be born for ages) grandchildren.


There, see? It stops me in my tracks every time too.

What’s your WHY? Make it big! I’d love to hear it in the comments below.

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